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i <3 college [Aug. 29th, 2007|01:32 pm]
WHENEVER Richard Cory went down town,
We people on the pavement looked at him:
He was a gentleman from sole to crown,
Clean favored, and imperially slim.

And he was always quietly arrayed,
And he was always human when he talked;
But still he fluttered pulses when he said,
"Good-morning," and he glittered when he walked.

And he was rich—yes, richer than a king,
And admirably schooled in every grace:
In fine, we thought that he was everything
To make us wish that we were in his place.

So on we worked, and waited for the light,
And went without the meat, and cursed the bread;
And Richard Cory, one calm summer night,
Went home and put a bullet through his head.

-Louis Untermeyer
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is it so hard to believe what you do to me? [Apr. 13th, 2007|05:34 pm]
[Current Music |lillingtons - lost my marbles]

my future is looking bleak

it's been brought to my attention that something i love very much and something that i rely on daily could be ruined. and i already know, it's all in my head. but i can't seem to stop torturing myself. these days, all i do is wonder about that day. the day that everything falls apart and i'm left to start over. no matter how many times in my life i've started over, i think this may be the most difficult to pick myself back up from. what can i do to stop it? well, my immediate thought was "absolutely nothing" because there really is nothing i can do. my only solution involves me and no one else. i can't change what's going to happen in other people's lives but i can change mine. and maybe i should just try not caring. but then i have to ask myself, "can i really just not care about this?" there are many things i can ignore, but that's because those things aren't important to me.

i just can't wait until i'm out of that school and none of this petty bullshit can phase me. these people (and one person in particular) that now have the potential to ruin my life will no longer matter when i never have to see them again. they can do whatever they want, and it won't affect me. i just hope that when the day comes, i'm far away and oblivious. what i don't know can't hurt me, right?
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(no subject) [Apr. 1st, 2007|06:06 pm]
[Current Music |groovie ghoulies - the blob]

Photo Sharing and Video Hosting at Photobucket
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(no subject) [Feb. 26th, 2007|05:47 pm]
[Current Music |riverdales - party at the beach]

i'm on a roll and i love it
it feels good to get things done when they need to be
i'm just afraid to fall out of the mode i'm in

school can be so easy
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the way things were supposed to be [Feb. 19th, 2007|03:23 pm]
[Current Music |mr t experience - ba ba ba ba ba]

i've been wrong.
everything i thought i knew about people and relationships has turned out to be the exact opposite of reality. i think i knew all along that something wasn't right. god forbid that something (or someone) was me. but i've made a (more or less) discovery today that, i think, may change my life. not in an astronomical way of course, but just enough. the perfect amount to get me back on track to finding me.

i used to believe that your enemies are the people you're supposed to watch out for. i was always concerned with what the people i hated were doing. which ones were reading my livejournal (oh my!), which ones were talking shit about me. but the truth is, those people should have absolutely no control over me.

its my friends, the ones that i keep close that i need to watch out for. the people you consider friends are the people who know your weaknesses. they know exactly what it takes to grab your heart and tear it into pieces. even if those aren't the intentions of those you hold dear, it's bound to happen. put all of your trust, your expectations, your hopes, your life into a person and you're basically giving up yourself. you have no defense against the kind of let down you can experience from a person you've given yourself to.

be careful about who you chose to be your true friend. and i don't mean acquaintances that you meet at school or work. or those people that you're just associated with through other friends. or those people that you hang out with that you know nothing about besides what drink they like to get fucked up on. i mean those people that you think you can give yourself to. how many people are worth that?
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(no subject) [Feb. 14th, 2007|07:35 pm]
how long will our love last?
i'm very glad you asked
cause if the world don't end
and the sun don't blot
out from the sky
and we don't get drive-by shot
and if we kiss each other a lot
our love will last forever and ever
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(no subject) [Feb. 12th, 2007|04:11 pm]
i just caught myself in one of those moments
where you feel like you're just completely pathetic
and you should stop whatever stupid thing you're doing
before someone else notices you're doing it

those should not exist
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(no subject) [Feb. 12th, 2007|03:51 pm]
school sucks
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(no subject) [Feb. 11th, 2007|04:20 pm]
[Current Music |mr t experience - you you you]

last night reminded me of summer
i miss it so

18 sucks
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(no subject) [Feb. 10th, 2007|04:36 pm]
if i could change it i would
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